don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
