Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
