My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
