Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Randomize