at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
