I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
