Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just pynch a tree in the face
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize