I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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