her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
