that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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