never play flip cup with pint glasses
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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