...so i touched it.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize