We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
