Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
