We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Randomize
