Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
did i just pee glitter
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
