I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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