I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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