Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize