I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
