The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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