I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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