you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
