dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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