When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
