I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
