Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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