You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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