But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
