pedialite and red bull = repair kit
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Enjoy the penises
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
