You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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