question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
