Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
