Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
