I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
