we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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