We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
love makes seman taste better
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Randomize
