I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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