She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
