Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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