Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
