We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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