Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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