I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
