Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
