I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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