We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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