Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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