I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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