Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
