I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
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