I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
